The strangest thing happened to me this morning. It was the moment I thought I had been waiting for. I had dreamed of this moment. Through the triage of short turnaround times between band, math Olympiad, paper route and.....HOCKEY. During the rushed makeshift meals I called dinner. While hurriedly helping to dress my skaters numerous times a week. While walking over and around four hockey bags in our living room. In the weeks where practice and game schedules changed multiple times. During all these moments, I thought of the end. Hockey tests a parent's stamina for the sport without a doubt. All those times I wished I would open the "Squirt B - EYHA" tab (placed conveniently in our favorites bar for quick reference) and see nothing, just a blank slate that would mean, for me, the end of the hockey shuffle. Now it is here.
I knew nothing remained on the calendar. I had been told this. However, my skepticism prevailed. Partially out of habit and partly out of disbelief, I clicked on that "favorite" tab again this morning. What to my wondering eyes should appear? Nothing. Not one ounce of hockey listed. I found myself in a strange place. What I felt was actually quite unexpected. It was there so visually laid out before me....the END of hockey season. I find it hard to admit, but I honestly felt a bit of a sadness come over me.
All three kids have been playing hockey since the season began back in October. Sophie and Drew still play in a "house" program which means, other than waking up early every single weekend morning for four months, there isn't a great impact to our lives. They go to the local rink, play for an hour, it's low-key, and not particularly all-consuming. Zach, on the other hand, made the switch from the house program to the "travel" program this year. This hadn't been our plan. We have always maintained our philosophy is just to keep the kids involved and active, not to kill ourselves or need to mortgage our home doing it. However, when we learned the numbers were low in the house program for his age level, we gave Z the option of switching gears. In the interest of playing "real" games and playing more hockey, Zach anxiously chose travel. We did not know at the time what to expect. Now we know.
"Travel" hockey means committing yourself to the sport for 4 months. We learned hockey is not just about the player. Travel hockey is a family affair. We learned that there are great lessons - good and bad - to be learned in the locker room, in a hotel room, on long car rides to far away places and on the ice. I learned that my husband is one dedicated man...to his kids, to positive coaching and to hockey. I wish I could call myself a "hockey mom", but for all my complaining about schedules, shuffling and dressing kids, I handled about a quarter of the hockey (that may even be a stretch) of what he did this season.
Most of all we learned a lot about our kids, especially Zach. They all show a dedication and commitment that I think is rare at their ages. Every time there was a 6:30 a.m. practice, I would indignantly say to Dan, "we are NOT making them get up at that hour. I am just not going to do that to my kids". The next morning, they would appear at our bedside at 5:15 asking if it was time to go to the rink. Every time I wondered how homework was going to get done in the midst of the craziness and I would remind all of us what our priorities are, I was told homework was already done and reading could be done in the car. Once I saw a coach being what I believed to be inappropriately tough on my child and my child in tears. I thought this would be the end. Instead, what I saw as I sat behind the bench like Mama Bear at the next game, was my son bantering with the same coach and telling him he's got his coaching style all figured out. When I threatened not going to hockey as a punishment one day, I received a commentary about how any other consequence would be acceptable, but not that one because being part of a team means being there for your team. While Zach, and each of the kids, has improved beyond words throughout the season, it is all the lessons about life that made the season most valuable, I think. I was forced to learn some lessons along the way too....how to be flexible, patient and willing to see the sport from the kids' perspective. One thing I never could get used to was the every changing calendar. I consider myself a flexible person, but the schedule would change frequently, sometimes adding multiple practices at the last hour - no one likes to see ice time go unused! So, seeing the calendar absent of ice time this morning is bittersweet.
Hockey really is a game of life and I can honestly say I am sad to see the calendar empty this morning. Who knows what next year will bring. Perhaps none will want to play. Perhaps we will be doing travel for three kids. It is hard now to tell and it makes no difference to us. I know now, though, that whatever happens we will make it through the triage of the season and I know that after the dust has settled, after all the ups and downs, I will think it is an investment well worth it. Will our kids ever be superstar hockey players? Very unlikely. Will they learn great lessons along the way? They already have....and so have I.